Madrid Gastro Guide, 2
Chapter 8 paragraph 2, of another bloody gastro guide, in my Spanish home, Madrid!
Madrid mola.
What does 'mola' mean, you say? Well, it's a wonderful word only people from Madrid use to express their admiration for something. When you say 'mola, you're not just appreciating something; you're embodying that coolness yourself (at least, I like to think so.)
Well, the food in Madrid mola.
Contrary to what paragraph 1 of another bloody gastro guide in Madrid might have you believe. The food in Madrid is not all callos (tripe) and pigs ears.
Anyway, enough of my terrible use of the Spanish language, and I'll get to the food, shall I? Welcome to paragraph 2 of another bloody gastro guide in Madrid, where I will tell you why Madrid, mola.
Proof that Madrid mola and that using the word mola, is cool.
Start your day with a Napolitana de crema at the not so secret La Mallorquina
Even though La Mallorquina is in the busiest and most central part of Madrid (Plaza Sol) and attracts hordes of tourists, don’t be put off. It is all worth it for the Napolitana de crema (a custard-filled bready pastry topped with almonds.)
And never forget your daily Horchata
Every time I grace my lips with a cold glass of Horchata (milk made with tiger nuts), I think to myself, why does anyone drink alcohol when you can drink Horchata instead? When you drink Horchata, any other beverage feels overrated. As I say in the video, it is the drink of the gods. Although Horchata was born in Valencia, I drink a lot of it in Madrid because it is available, and well, the addiction I have to it is real. It is properly good at La Mallorquina and Tutti Fruitti ice cream shop.
And always scream for icecream
Despite Madrid being hot, the ice cream game is generally low, and being someone who is (to make no exaggeration) made of 90 per cent ice cream. When in Madrid, I always make the descent slightly outside the centre to Tutti Fruitti artisanal ice cream shop because it never disappoints. Try the violeta for one scoop and black sesame for the other, and thank me later.
Make churros and chocolate sexy again
Chocolate and churros are some of the most well-known foods people come to Madrid to try, made famous by the Madrid institution, San Ginés. I personally just don’t think they’re that sexy. The chocolate is thick and too rich to finish, and the queue to get your hands on a churro is long and tiresome. But should you, like me, be able to make chocolate and churros sexy again, you could go to chocolate in the Anton Martin district, where you won’t have to queue, and the chocolate is less rich. But to be TOTALLY honest with you, churros are better dipped into a café con leche (milky coffee), and that is what you will find most madrileños (people from Madrid) doing, too, anyway.
Breakfast on the best breakfast in the world (tortilla de patata) in probably the best place to eat it in the world
Anthony Bourdain (R.I.P) told the world that the best tortilla de patatas is made at Casa Dani's, tucked away in the gourmet market Mercado de la Paz, Madrid. It is no exaggeration to say that I have eaten hundreds of tortilla de patatas, so one morning on my last trip to Madrid, I booked an Uber from my bed in the Lavapies district to make a 3km pilgrimage to Casa Dani's to test out Bourdain's hypothesis. The verdict? It was worth the Uber trip. Considering the hype, it is a fantastic tortilla, which I assume is consistently excellent. Even though they are made with a few ingredients (eggs, potato, olive oil, sometimes onion), they can be wildly different, depending on a few things. How long do you caramelise the onions, if using onions at all? How many eggs? Before the second step, do you cool the potatoes and onions in the egg mixture? How runny do you want to make it, and what size do you cut the potatoes? It might not sound like it, but these decisions make a massive difference in the end result. Tortilla de patata making is no less than an art. Casa Dani's tortilla was rich and sweet with a lot of onions. It was the right side of gooey and served with the perfect chunk of bread. When you try a tortilla de patata with bread, you'll learn that serving bread with potato is completely necessary. Anyway, Casa Dani is a yes from me, Bourdain.
Feast madrid styley with a cocido madrileño
Cocido madrileño is a feast fit for any Spanish king or queen, yet made of cheap and unfussy ingredients. First, a broth makes its way to your table with tiny pasta pieces inside called fideos. This broth is simply the sum of all the meat that will later be brought to the table, cooked very importantly, in ‘agua de Madrid’ (water from Madrid.) Water from Madrid is unquestionably the most important ingredient; the best-tasting water in Spain, madrileños may tell you to the world. It is excellent water filtered through the granite soil of the nearby mountains. Next, chickpeas, also grown in the Madrid region, and potatoes will grace your table, all cooked in pork fat. Next, cabbage, boiled in water from Madrid, and a Romanesco sauce, chilli pickles, tiny sweet pickled onions, raw spring onion, and cornichons to cut through all that rich. And if that wasn’t enough, the meat will be brought to the party, whether you like it or not. Pigs ears, legs, chicken, blood sausage, chorizo. It just makes sense, doesn’t it? It’s frugal and intelligent; each bowl is a new combination, and NOBODY will ever leave the table hungry. I tried the one photographed in Malacatín.
Bacalao Baca now
If you look on TikTok, you might think that a Bocadillo de calamari (calamari sandwich) is Madrid's most typical fishy treat. Bocadillo de calamari was invented by some king of Spain who thought it would be an intelligent way to use up calamari that wasn't so fresh (remember, Madrid isn't by the sea). Frying it would ensure it wouldn't make people sick, and because this is Spain, it goes in white bread, like everything else. Go ahead and try it, but be warned that we madrileños do enjoy laughing at all the 'gurris' ( annoying tourists) eating their calamari sandwiches in the gurri land of the busy plaza mayor (the land of calamari sandwiches) as we stroll through it to do better than that someplace else. You can also do better than that. How? With Bacaloa (fried salt cod), of course. The fish is kept fresh naturally through salt preservation; it's juicy, fresh, and perfect just the way it is. There is no better sight to the eyes of a madrieleña than an ice-cold caña (little extra cold beer) of Mahou and a fresh pincho of Bacaloa. Casa Revuelta and Casa Labra both serve just that. It's fish and chips, Madrid style. Just don't tell anyone I told you.
Never miss ya daily fish at la casa de las sardinas asadas (house of grilled sardines)
Is it just me who is obsessed with places that serve basically one thing and do that one thing well? At Bar Santurce, AKA La Casa de las Sardinas, they do just that, grilled sardines, always with a side of Padron peppers. There are no knives and forks, and when it is busy ( which is often), you are encouraged to throw all your sardine bones on the floor to be logically swept up. It’s barbarous, and I love it.
Eat a slipper
La Zapatilla (the slipper) is a sandwich to be taken seriously. Yet it is simple, with mozzarella-like cheese and lomo (bacon-like pork), and will offend nobody. Bar Melos is where you can find this particular monster. Bring your friends.
More? Sure! I am eager to please.
For more culinary adventures from Madrid, don't miss out on Madrid Gastro Guide Part 1.
And here, for a restaurant spotlight of Sala De Despiece, Madrid.
See you next time, chickens!
From that bloody foody, that is, Lana
x
Great post 👍
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